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decafitated

 

(smothered)

i can see far past the bounds of my existence

and there is this kind of peace, unheard

in this dream i fight reality and resistance

and battle lingers in spoken words

but, i feel this life being strangled from me, and i fight to breathe

but, i'm being suffocated... suffocated by all your lies

breathe

coughing

choking

yes you are provoking me

fishing for a meatier soul

even old i still grow

spinning in your pleasure/pain

so strange, eyes like flames

well i'm coughing

well i'm choking

yes you are provoking me

breathing in your gasoline fear

all clear, i can't hear

tasting the dirt of your sins

call me, i comprehend

well i'm coughing

well i'm choking

yes, you are provoking

i can't breathe

i can't breathe

suffocate me

suffocate me

well i'm coughing

well i'm choking

yes, you are provoking me

i can't breathe

push-e

concrete and so heavy

my heart beats to save me

but inside all the blaming

all the walls are caving

look through eyes so shaming

idols misbehaving

just a little hazy

just a little crazy

and you keep on pushing me

and you keep on pushing me

and you keep on pushing me

everyone so godly

all drop down pray with me

now you ask how art thee

and i say repenting

fallen and so guilty

for this life you gave me

starving and so hungry

for this pain i'm craving

and you keep on pushing me

and you keep on pushing me

and you keep on pushing me

fm

some kind of fear takes me over

rising up to conquer this reality

stale to this process my mind is slower

adding to the breakdown of my rationality

i am i am systematic systematic

i hope this doesn't last too long

these days possessed by nightfall

like a fucking machine growing strong

working me over and i just might crawl

filter through this sanity

empty with uncertainty

fighting for my gravity

it's just a piece of me

i am i am systematic systematic

some kind of monster takes me over

ties me up to a cross of memories

suffer my loses my mind is slower

adding to the breakdown of my rationality

filter through this sanity

empty with uncertainty

fighting for my gravity

it's just a piece of me

i am systematically confused

i am tragically abused

holding on to you

spitting out the courage

i'm through

filter through this sanity

empty with uncertainty

fighting for my gravity

it's just a piece of me

finer things

i'm covering up the finer things

blistered by your evil ways

i find the fire in the things you say

with your words you mold my pain

mold my pain like clay

can you see it

i will show you

can you see it

looking with my heart i don't find it

it's covered in the leaves of discontent

stolen from the branches of my soul

by the wind that burns me oh so cold

temptation and all it brings

starvation keeps me hungry for the finer things

you ripping into my skin

hoping to find the weakness within

there it is in all of its splendor

the anger that is sore

the anger that is so tender

temptation and all it brings

starvation keeps me hungry for the finer things

and i don't understand it

and i just can't handle it

my wasted life

my wasted time

live for the trauma

and die for what's mine

crawl through your pity

and fall out of line

pray on your altar

and i wait for a sign

temptation and all it brings

starvation keeps me hungry for the finer things in you

selfless

take

you can steal all that's real from my hand

fake

your broken soul, the story's old, tired and bland

i'll do nothing

something for myself

cry

it drips away like melted days from my eyes

reply

when you speak, your voice is weak from your lies

i'll do nothing

something for myself

stepping on my tongue

just to keep your dreams alive

walking over bones

and all the secrets that you hide

no one can love me like myself

no one can love me like myself

take

you can steal all that's real from my hand

fake

your broken soul, the story's old, tired and bland

take

fake

all you can steal

cut + dry

sleepy and dry

wet me down

painted in tears

i'll be your clown

rot

i shut my eyes

so awaken the blind

rot

drawn to the inside

i shrink away

drawn to the inside

i shrink away

ashes be still

dusting my will

it's all gone awry

cause it's cut and dry

rot

drawn to the inside

i shrink away

drawn to the inside

i shrink away

tiny little torturer what's your device

let it sink in all nice and tight

you know it makes me feel good to see you hostile inside

but i've lost all the innocence of my prime

and i can tell you it's all gone awry

it leaves you with a feeling that's cut and dry

rot

drawn to the inside

i shrink away

drawn to the inside

i shrink away

crazy

crazy. i'm crazy for feeling so lonely

i'm crazy, crazy for feeling so blue

i knew you would love me as long as you wanted

and then someday leave me for somebody new

worry, why do i let myself worry?

wondering what in the world will i do?

crazy for thinking that my love could hold you

i'm crazy for trying and crazy for crying

and i'm crazy for loving you

crazy for thinking my love could hold you

i'm crazy for trying and crazy for crying

and i'm crazy for loving you

smeared

broken little pieces of my life to be

rubbed out by fault

broken and bleeding of the wounds that be

rubbed in like salt

fragile and it eats me alive

i layer up my skin and hide

i can feel the seed turning mean

growling pissed off inside of me

spoken little voices in my head you see

smeared into the air

spoken lies and choices it's easier to see

the smeared soul i bare

it's the hassle that keeps me alive

the skin is fear on the inside

it's the asshole that's turning me

pissed on and angry begging

you can't stop me from

taking you down

rage in me from

this pain i found

wash with me in

this suicide

tell me you can see it

in my bloodshot eyes

broken little pieces of my memories

rubbed out by fault

broken and bleeding, that don't mean shit to me

rubbed in like salt

it's the hassle that eats me alive

layer up my skin and hide

it's the asshole that's turning mean

pissed on and angry begging

you can't stop me from

taking you down

rage in me from

this pain i found

wash with me in

this suicide

tell me you can see it

in my bloodshot eyes

dirty

slap back daddy and a white glove hand

kite high mind and a pocket full of sand

taste on the tongue that was left by a man

slap back daddy's got dirty little hands

chew up the life and pick the strings from your teeth

shadow of a man at a little boy's feet

they attack on a day you won't forget

scream through a night of time less spent

slap back daddy and his white collar friends

drink up and drown in sin

he can't sit and he can't bend

slap back daddy's got dirty little friends

you are so sweet

something special

is it for the love of this

does it make you feel special

 

 

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